My brain says no but my pants say off.
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
Singing into hair straightener during spice girls....sooo dangerous
When I got to his place, he served wine and cheese and made me sit on the balcony while he read his poetry to me. He cockblocked himself.
the pic of her and her boyfriend fell off the wall as we were fucking.
she pulled the sheets over her head to blow me but the static kept making little lightning bolts and I was too high and got really scared she was going to electrocute me.
I'm bleeding from my lower lip, and I have bruises around my neck. It was just easier to say I got mugged.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
First and foremost she's my friend, but she's also a mistake I make when I'm drunk
Juss got out of jail; shes still in there tryin to sing her abc's backwards bc the cops neva asked her too... Whebever she gets to t she starts singin the tequilla song
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
I keep shaking cocoa puffs out of my hair. Best Sunday Funday ever.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
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