you know when i was in school the girls definitely did not have the tits the 15 year olds have now. so unfair.
how soon is too soon after the break-up to ask for my condoms back?
It was as awful as eating cow testicles on fear factor and not winning and realizing you ate balls for nothing.
I didn't realize he wasn't circumcised... it looked like the Unibomber...
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
The guy at the Apple store said the warranty does NOT cover getting cum out of the keyboard. I can't believe I believed you.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Just saw Santa sitting on a restaurant patio drinking beer and using his free hand to gesture to cars that he's watching them
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
well whats the tarot card for I'm totes going to be schlobbing his cob? because that's in his future.
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Randomize