This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
I just signed a document stating that I would dd all summer if they would go pickup food.
His threats seemed pretty legit for a 6 year old
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
When did angry sex become our thing?
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
I'm taking ecstasy it's gonna be that kind of Vegas trip
Dude, you need better judgement.Trust me I know. I put my dick in the wrong mouths all the time
I'm not dealing with this wiskey dick shit, 2016 is the year of hard dicks
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Randomize
