3 deer just ran past us on the street. At least I get to see some tail tonight
when I'm not with you everything just looks like crayon scribble
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
My brain is officially off for summer until late august. If that guy wants to fuck me, he better do it soon.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
While we were having sex he told me "this is what you get for not parking my car right" I have never drove his car. He was that kind of weird.
she's living proof man. somebody has literally pissed in the gene pool
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
So we were having sex and his roommate walks in eating a bag of chips. Then proceeds to talk to us about his bitch of a professor.
Did he at least offer you guys chips?
I threw up off of your balcony and it must have been loud because the dog downstairs went insane.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
Dude, never piss off a hungover boss.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
Holy fuck, my entire boob is bruised! Lierally my boob is just one big bruise.
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