I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
Just ducktaped my beer to my bike. See you in ten.
i'm drunk and confused. there might be a 4 year old here.
Aaaaand I just watched him face plant in front of the taxi. This is why we don't invite him to margarita night.
I lost my grandmas ring. Probably during the handjob.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I left my panties in the microwave for too long and they caught on fire
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
Hun your dick isn't big enough for you to be that lame and predictable
She tried doing a backflip and ended up doing somersaults down the entire stair case.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
Why is no one on Snapchat tonight? I want to see other people having fun so I know it still exists.
We made out in front of everyone INCLUDING his girlfriend. And no one saw. THAT DRUNK!
Randomize
