Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I wasted some perfectly good semen on her
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
He gave me an orgasm before we even reached 2nd base, everything he did in high school is irrelevant.
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
There's no triumph quite like finally banging your high school boyfriend 6 years later
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
Randomize
