He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
I just saw the host of Singled Out do standup. Holy shit 1995.
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
almost getting arrested is turning into fucking this cop in his ex wife's lawn. see you tomorrow
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
...hi
YOU SHOULD BE ASHAMED OF YOURSELF
Ok cool I was afraid you'd never speak to me again. I can work with this.
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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