Dude michael jackson died, guess he's not 'stayin aliveee' any longer.
Uh dude that wasn't a michael jackson song it was the BGs
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Lets get really high and only speak Spanish to each other again tonight
either way he was missing a nipple.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Whatever she smells like compost and feathers.
I believe they call that patchouli.
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Welcome to the single world where it seems vibrator batteries are in short supply and making a sandwich while naked at 2am is relatively normal
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
She was gone when I unblacked out, but she had nailed her panties to the wall and wrote “Colleen’s Dick”with a sharpie on the wall. No idea where she got a hammer and nail
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