I'm laying in your front yard are you home
Her "get-your-paper-done-early-blowjob" incentive is the thing that has successfully deterred my procrastination
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
i dont know everytime i see her teeth i get erectile disfunction
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
I had no idea a 5'8 girl could fit entirely on her knees in front of the passenger seat of a Sunfire, but I am very happy to now have that knowledge.
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
Btw... when someone is licking your balls, "yeah... that's not the worst thing in the world" is not an appropriate compliment/thank you.
It's like your nipple is comforting my nipple.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
IT'S FUCKING BABY SEASON ON FACEBOOK. MY VAGINA WANTS TO THROW UP
Full body rubs, head scratches, foot rubs, massages, a penis that is able to get hard whenever you want it. I mean ive got a lot to offer
My mom is worried I'm not eating enough protein so she's sending me 48 cans of tuna. That's not a typo.
Randomize
