I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
I can't finish this paper in my room because every time I get distracted I start masterbating. I think it's time to go to the library...
You owe me a new pair of headphones. You plugged mine into the top of a mustard bottle.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
The difference between what I would do for a regular Klondike bar and an Oreo flavored Klondike bar is astounding
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
It's been so long since i rode in a trunk. I'm riding in a trunk btw
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
His roommates came in the room and were throwing snowballs at us while we were hooking up.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
being broke is really keeping my alcoholism in check
You know that episode of Spongebob where Patrick teaches Spongebob to be fancy? His dick was like that, only fancier.
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