she looked like the bat from fern gully.
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
i just watched a special on porn, the business isn't doing so good. You may want to wait before you start your career
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
Ohhh. Its been awhile. Vending machine hotel condoms are $15 here who can afford to not get herpes?
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
There's always a certain something about a day that begins with your panties in your purse.
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I just want to lay in a bed of egg mcmuffins and cry
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
idk the fact that her roommate had a sign that said "enter without knock, exit without cock" makes me really NOT want to go steal her pot.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Just woke up with the taste of tequila, weed, and cigarettes in my mouth spooning a friend I haven't seen since college wearing one contact and one ankle sock. I hate myself.
Randomize
