Let's hear it for middle of the street handjobs ladies and gentlemen
Are you kidding me. My sex life has diminshed to having wet dreams about jerking off.
I dont understand how a fully grown man could convince himself that lime green crocks would look good on him.
let's skip the party, and just play drunken wii, again. its time to give my vag a break.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
Drinking a bawls. If I'm dead when you get home, yes, they are poisoned.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
Just woke up to find that I'd left a stove burner on for the past 6 hours or so. I'm now banned from Ambien cooking.
One day soon I'll learn the difference between a good high and way too high. Today is not the day.
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