Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
the fog machine set off the whole complexes fire alarm
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
well I think it'll pretty much be gone by Saturday. On a scale of 1- Snooki's unborn child how much do periods freak you out?
OMG IM A TIGER AND I LOVE ROARING
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
That's the ultimate walk-of-shame: running away from your own apartment and hiding in a McDonald's.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
that's the second time I've made out with him and woken up with my pants stuffed with PBRs I am convinced he's magic
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Well I'm a full service fuck buddy so lemme know if I can get you food or water or anything
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
If I lock her out of the apartment right now would the neighbors have grounds to sue?
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