so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
I'm making progress with her.. She actually looked at me today and gave me a dirty look. Things are going real good.
I just heard someone say "gosh-darnit" and they didn't have a southern twang. I worry for New York.
OMG. if college stays like this, theres no way i wont be pregnant by first semester
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
riding the spinning bikes at the rec after Valentines Day was a baaddddd idea
Why do I always miss the parties you're naked at?!
I get naked cuz your not there
I think your dad took our porno
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
Of course my parents remember you. You showed them your tits
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