11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
she fell down the flight of stairs and was fine until she saw the two broken beer bottles on the ground by her.
thats a woman
we are driving next to a guy driving and masturbating while looking at a naked magazine. I love LA
Life is so much better after having sex.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
Oh yeah, found out i got it from my boyfriend's wife. Thanks though.
Are you aware that you called me "Sexy clit lady" last night?
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
It's like my uterus needs a hug... and anti depressants
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
i asked her if she was sure that she was ready to do it and she replied with "come at me bro"
Randomize
