plz talk dirty to me
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
In hindsight, buying 4 different kinds of vibrators at once may have been a little overenthusiastic of me.
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
I straight up told your dad I've slept with a majority of your family
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
And here I thought that was one nut sack too many
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
Refresh my memory....were we forced to leave or did we choose to leave?
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
