sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
Dancing like a fucking crazy person to jai ho with a snow ball in her hand. Snow days make her go nuts.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
i know i should keep better track of the things that i put in your vagina but i've put so many things in there it's hard to keep track
Also I owe you 20 bucks, a clean towel and a glass of scotch. I'll even throw in a blow job
We hooked up and then we watched game of thrones while he fed me chocolate. I don't see how our benafriendship is a bad thing.
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
FUCK WHALES
Sexual Dilemma - Covid Edition: Flirting with a cute frat boy. The Cougar in me wants to go back to his frat house and fuck his cocky brains out. The adult in me doesn’t want to get Covid and have to quarantine in a frat house for 2 weeks\n
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