Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Ah shit... I sleep-ate chocolate pudding again.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
Cant wait to drunkenly tell by kids that i banged their aunt katie in a weird threesome
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Though my hair looks fantastic i will unfortunately have to turn down your 4am sex offer
You tripped over nothing.. everyone stopped what they were doing and stared..you stood up and yelled "you win this time gravity"..then started chugging someone's drink
The fun I thought I would be having now when I was six is vastly different from what I am currently doing. Hurraaay sex and vicodin.
If a cougar buys you pizza and wants to show you her newly-won house, you have sex with her. It's the law. Just being all the man I can be dude
I gave his daughter swim lessons and in exchange he sold me an ounce. I feel so accomplished.
My one night stand from last weekend is now taking me on a date this weekend. How is this my life?
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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