There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I'm currently trying to figure out how I woke up naked and handcuffed to my bed. Not real worried about class right now.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
Dude just pulled his dick out and started stroking it and making s sound like cocking a shotgun....wtf was in those e pills
Just peed in the fountain while its snowing. Fell flat on my ass, literally my butt naked ass in a pile of snow. It's safe to say I'm done with drinking on weekdays
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
Randomize
