Scared. last time someone tried to talk me into they said it tastes like tapioca and i projectiled onto a closed window
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
Omg just woke up. 6am. random apartment. broad daylight. bunch of ppl doin coke around me. Theres a bridge nearby. I think my dentist is down the block. Oof.
Although last time you were unsure about someone they flipped a golf cart on me.
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
I'm like an air traffic controller of women. It's a very similar job. Well spaced and gentle landings are good. When they meet, it's bad. Explosions bad. Dying screaming burning children bad.
So it was all good until she started grabbing my beard and telling me to "roar little lion"
We should probably start extreme couponing for the morning after pill.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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