People kept wishing me happy birthday last night. apparently i was 21st birthday drunk
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
only you would photoshop your dick
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
we're meeting twins and drinking tequila. i love life
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
Let's FaceTime each other while we shotgun beers
7% of guys ive been with can get me off... I did the math!
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize
