Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
I considered driving home in his mom's bathrobe until i realized i'd have to stop to buy cigarettes
I felt like I was in a real life creepy Myspace message. "girl u cute" ... "girl u got a really nice smile"
I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants
Let's face it. We both have sexy parts. Why not have them touch?!
Classy. Drunk on alcoholic "energy drink" at work before 8 am on a Tuesday. Between that and hanging out in bars with no pants on, your life is beginning to sound like a Bukowski novel.
Wow that was a lesbian tornado.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
Crappy Mother's Day to you! Those of us who don't have children fill the void with hot sex, sleeping in, more sex, leisurely suntanning, foreign travel, overseas sex, paying cash for sports cars, watching TV, having sex on the floor in front of TV porn, lounging around the house, or whatever the hell we want.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
I don’t know what he is but he sure can suck a lollipop.
I’m a lady. I promise I won’t oogle your junk when we go skinny dipping.
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