If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
you said the mailboxes were turning into babies and they started crawling away. then you cried and asked me how you were gonna get your college acceptance letters
she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
just walked past the recycling bin in class, there's keystone cans in it. go cougs.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
Lets just say I tried to pinky promise the cop... So I was fucked up.
Have you ever thrown up in the middle of your hair appointment? Cause I have..
I just used an Amazon gift card from a student to order a new vibrator....teacher of the year
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
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