Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
It's like a mixture of two words
"town" and "Im too drunk to spell right now"
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
I drink more single than I do in relationships. Except with assface.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
I thi k this dude I fcken showed up to the bar in a raisins shirts. I thought I was better than that. Fuckkkk.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
So I'll bring my machete and we can smoke your shit.
Out of context, that is a hilariously scary message.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I went to smoke a bowl and realized that my lighter is out and there's still frozen blueberries in my bong... I need to reevaluate my life...
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