kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Having a dry hump session to Alvin and the chipmunks surprisingly didn't kill the mood. He's that good.
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Chipotle. Because when you've had diarrhea for 6 days why not just make it 7
I need to quit being a slut. It's to the point that I got my period today and automatically I Believe I Can Fly popped into my head.
We had sex on the bear rug. He said "you, me and the bear. This is bear-idise"
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
I kind of just assumed by how he whisked eggs that he would be bad in bed.
I've never been so turned off by an omelet.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
I was like ahh were on two different pages, I know there's rumors of me moving to boston but I can't and I'm not adding long distance to the relationship I have with my 31 year old recently divorced ex boss
Maybe for you. You don't have to clean the melted butter off the stove. I LOST THE SPECIAL SEASONINGS.
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