Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
so now she's a stripper
can't say i'm surprised
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
she just made me lysol my hands in order to touch her tits.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
Yes I hit her with my car. Yes I gave her a ride home. And yes she gave me her number. What's the problem?
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
The police report said that there were 25 cases of bud light, two hookers fighting in the street, 13 cop cars, and two road blocks, a kid got tazered, another got maced, and over a hundred people in the house
So that means its a bad thing that your dad found it huh?
I'm hiding in a cabinet. I'm going to stay here.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
Will that be creepy to wake him up at midnight with my tongue all over his body??
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Randomize
