Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I just remembered we said the Lord's Prayer before we went out last night.
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
It's just one of those days where I'm too horny to function, to be perfectly honest.
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
There's just no proper way to thank a man for that many consecutive orgasims.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
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