Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
While I was fucking her, they came in and served us both weed from a hookah. best. friends. ever.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
Is shaving my mustache contingent on you sleeping over tonight?
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
There's a stoned dwarf chilling in the basement here. Maybe there are redeemable qualities about this place.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
In times of desperation, never...NEVER put green apple scented hand sanitizer on your vagina.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I've found my soulmate with the cardboard Dos Equis man.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
Randomize
