physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
then they high fived as they party boyed me. I was a policewoman sandwhich. I love you halloween.
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
well, the drug dealer I've been fucking the past 5 months gave me a chilis gift card for Christmas, so things are looking up.
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
So I got lost trying to find you guys and ended up proposing to a bride in a bachelorette party with a condom.
Going to the ER, I'll explain later but apparently drunk me isn't allergic to peanut butter.
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
So, I've discovered that I'm approximately 70% nicer to my mother when I've had an orgasm in the last 48 hours. It's science.
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
Randomize
