one might say we're banned from that church
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
Who the fuck was that guy he kept pulling his dick out walking up to people trying to hand it to people and saying go ahead open the door like it was a door knob
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
I didn't mind you coming over, just I'm quite sure most booty calls don't involve a scavenger hunt...
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
You brought string cheese to the strip club
listen. i haven't sucked a dick in well over three years but i believe in myself.
Pretty sure I got at least one girl to question her sexuality at the Christmas party last night
Funniest thing happened to Chloe! She talked the bf into a mmf threesome, and he loudly and enthusiastically discovered he was gay during it. Whole dorm literally heard it happen.Well funny for me. Chloe not so much.
Randomize
