VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I woke up this morning with a bag of pepperonis in my bed.... and my facebook status was "pepperonis"
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
I like my landing strip. Makes me feel sophisticated.
What you did last night can never be called sophisticated. I don't care how you trim your pubes.
To my wonderful winter break booty calls: thank you for making this holiday season enjoyable. I look forward to seeing you boys again this summer.
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
Dude. Steinbecking. It's when you double-fist coffee and alcohol to help you meet a writing deadline.
saw a dude wearin soccer cleats at the bar tonight. fuckin kiddin me man?
If it makes you feel any better they literally are drinking alcohol out of a toilet. They are serving drinks out of a nasty ass toilet...!
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
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