all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Dude there are two smokin hot chicks laying outside my apartment...I almost want to tell them theyre laying where I threw up last night
U should. Its a good ice breaker
You did not just nickname me "Nipples".
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
I need $500 dollars more than I need a night of dignity... I gonna do it.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Pretty sure they aren't letting me back to karaoke night after I screamed "fuck every one of you tasteless hillbillies!!" because I felt they didn't clap loud enough for Jen.
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I was running because his wife invited me to join them on their kinky Vegas weekend. Crossing state lines is too much commitment for me.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Randomize
