The best revenge is premature balding
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Gay walks of shame are so much more Amy Winehouse than straight girls
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Ok everyone, the frat server is slow because of the 11 TB of porn on there. Either clean out your partition by Sunday or it will be erased. Thanks for your help.
Whenever you get off. By "pick me up from work" I mean, "pick me up from a bar by work at your earliest convenience" :)
I`m watching Shallow Hal & Jack Black has better nipples than Jimmy's chick.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
I just fell out of my doorway to go to class so if that doesn't describe how my night went idk what will
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
Randomize
