No, asshole. I'm not gay. But if I was I think I would do better than fucking Nick Lachey.
It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
She made out with me for a free sandwich. What makes you think she is NOT up to my standards?
As we were fooling around he told me he was conceived on this bed like it would turn me on.
I'm not sure, 7-8, the last bit was a rush of at least three blended together. Basically you fucked me so stupid that I can't even recall the number of orgasms.
So you know, I'm making that my facebook status.
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Right now I'm drinking out of a gallon water jug & eating a baconator. If you're feeling down, just remember you could be me.
He was so high he started playing Twister on the striped rug. Then when we missed midnight he went on a screaming rampage about his New Year's Eve being meaningless. How do you think it went?
i accidentally gave my stepdad ketamine so id say it was a fun weekend.
Dude if I had a dollar for everytime she asked me to do weird shit with her when we were fucking I'd have like 4$
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
I just don't understand what you plan on accomplishing there except for losing all vestiges of post-freshman year dignity
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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