i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
Well, if they're both my boyfriend.. Then i cheated on both of them.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
If you would give me the chance we might have the two separate pieces of the greatest fuck puzzle ever.
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Saw a thong on the yellow lines of the street when I left this morning, are they yours by any chance?
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