they need to just BURY HIM!
Bt dubs, I still have cuts on my arm from when you attacked me with a dildo on Saturday night.
The bouncer asked you what your sign was and u replied "syracuse"
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I may or may not have tried to give myself a lobotomy
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
