Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
in jail i did the beyonce ass shake for the police officers & called Sally from my collect phone in my cell & started singing "im in JAAAIL IM IN JAAAIL",
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
left comments onEVRY SINGLE1of my posts n status updates.Im done dating freshmen
Some guy said that sham wows were the same as regular shammys. needless to say you had to be restrained. you kept trying to 'slap chop' him.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I found out his name. Apparently we sat in the shower together and flooded the bathroom.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
This hobo said he can't buy alcohol bc he got in trouble bc a girl sat on his face when he was passed out and misaligned his spine and gave him Alzheimer's so Ali is buying him a bottle. This is Vegas.
I can't remember much from that party after we snapchatted my dancing boobs to all of her contacts
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
you seriously don't remember..? but then again, you were taking shots by yourself for like 30mins
No one knows how to work that "I pulled a muscle in my leg" drunk swagger like you can
Randomize
