White coat. Heels.
i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
Do you know how difficult it is to give head to someone who's imitating Forrest Gump?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
There is a time and place for BDSM, in-between disney sing-alongs is not one of them.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
And he kept lifting up his shirt every few minutes to check if his nipples were still there
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
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