if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
I dont know how to say this. But the hottest girl where im at has one arm.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I don't think a gay three way is the best way to confirm your sexuality.
Then when he got home he face timed me and showed me his balls
Don't need my thirties to be known as the decade of "new types of shits from drinking" like last night.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Randomize
