I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
I woke up with the suicide hotline number saved as 'Hot Guy Josh'
Someone sharpied "COCK HUNGRY" on my butt cheeks last night. When the fuck did I have my ass out?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
I think you should do the fixer upper relationship. Like lawyers do pro bono work with underserved populations, you can do pro bono relationship work.
Listen here, Ms. "I'm Gonna Get Super Drunk and Run From My Friends Screaming That They Were Going to Drag Her to a Scientology Recruitment Camp"...
We're gonna start a pole dancing competition or a bar fight. Stand by for results.
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
Randomize