the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I am not speculating about which disney princesses do and do not have gag reflexes
Let me guess--your parents are cousins.
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
the beat of "birthday sex" is shockingly similar to my dry heaving rhythm. it's making me nauseous all over again.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
People said that when they tried to talk to me I answered that there was a glass around my head stopping me from answering them
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
Idk every story shes told me thats started with "back when i was a lesbian" has been my new favorite story
I have bruises from doing the splits on the poles, if that doesn't scream bourbon street regret then I don't know what does
Twice. I only peed my pants twice tonight.
I need to hurry up and get over my feelings for him so next year's tipsy reunion sex won't be clouded by emotions.
i'm pretty sure my brother is still drunk from last night. he's telling my parents that humans are at the top of the food chain for a reason and listing off all the exotic animals he would eat
Wrong Cuomo but I had a dream last night in which I was very sexually attracted to Chris
Randomize
