do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
His penis without viagra is what breaks my heart.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Well I went on a freakin rampage and destroyed a fan and claimed that it wasn't doing its fan duties... Then I knocked on everybody's doors in the hall and asked if they were content with their fan's performance and if not I would take care of it...
Watched twin sisters make out thought it was amazing sick on their part but legit to watch
You got a write up and a first aid award all in the same night. The don was impressed!
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
Someone called asking about the gate code and I said "hashtag" for # instead of "pound." Ugh. I feel so dirty.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now
Randomize
