Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
this is the second time this summer that a girl has called me a ken dol
you shouldn't let them see you without your pants on
She asked me how I live with myself. I told her one night at a time.
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.
IF CHARLIE SCHEEN CAN DO IT I CAN DO IT IM A PROFESSONAL
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
The best part about living in a college town is the annual rush of senior girls who want to get in their lesbian experiment before they graduate.
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
Randomize
