i think i'm in class. and blacked out.
I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
We were just about to get down to business and shes like oh the olympics! and jumped up and turned on the tv. cockblocked by freestyle skiing. seriously?
Who won mens moguls?
That canadian guy... bilodeau... but you're missing the point, dude.
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
I send him pictures of my tits whenever I feel like he's paying too much attention to his girlfriend.
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
If it goes near your penis, it should not go near the Hawks.
I'm drinking and making muffins and I believe this is why God put us on earth.
I'm in jersey with marbles.. He's blasted about to fuck a manatee and his entire family is trying to stop it. His mother punched me in the chest for not trying hard enough
I'm just imagining Oprah like "you're popping a boner, and you're popping a boner...EVERYONE IS POPPING A BONER"
Compositionally, that's actually a really nice picture.
And your penis looks really nice too.
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
I gave Sophia a glitter bomb for Christmas. And before you ask is because she pooped in my cat litter box and then drank all my liquor and didn't pay me back and refuses to acknowledge that she had any wrongdoing. So she gets to clean up glitter for the next 10 years.
Randomize
