This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
I just woke up in my car with half the wedding cake next to me. This will not end well.
This smoking ban is really fucking with my ability to fart in public
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Don't judge them too harshly for getting kicked out of a strip club. Happens to the best of us.
You are the coolest girlfriend ever.
So help my penis see only you. Give him some attention as well.
There is a 90 percent chance I threw up in a mailbox last night....
He was so aggressive it felt like he was giving my boob a root cannal
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
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