im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
we sang "a whole new world" together. either he's my gay best friend or the love of my life.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I told him I'd rather have sex with his father last night. I'll admit now that I was drunk.
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
I heard that clinking noise from behind me and I already knew you were whipping out a Smirnoff in class. Again.
I just made a drink so ill shit. It's goona be great. Ill tell you about it when you get here. Get pumped. For my shit.
Okay Im still jerking off but now with the Reality of Law School Looming In The Distance
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
I choose my mates solely based on size and ability. No cuddles. No sleep overs. Definitely no repeats.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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