Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
at least if we puke, we will be surrounded by beautiful, non-judgemental trees.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
we were at work and Infront of the whole bar you yelled. "JAKE I WANNA GET FUCKED TONIGHT!" Us day drinking > everyone else
i was enjoying my post acid trip trance a little too much. i found $50 on the sidewalk but didnt pick it up. just stared at the bill cuz it looked cool.
someone picked it up and i stared at the ground where it was for probably another minute or 2
omg sorry but i tried to stop you when you were at your drunk limit but i took my eyes off you for like 2 seconds and you suddenly appeared with hard liquor in both hands for yourself and downed them and it was downhill from there
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
Like I'm literally drinking whiskey and making a stocking for my cat right now. What. Goes. On.
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I am thinking about buying a decorative chest for all our sex stuff....
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
Randomize
