Haven't eaten in 11 hrs. I am gonna have so much material to talk about with anorexic girls now
Seriously, I'm delusional. Idk how these models even walk on the runway
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
And as cleavage season comes to a close, so blooms a new season of yoga pants. And the people rejoiced.
I'm eating ramen over the toilet. Fuck my life
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
So...I was fapping and during it, I got an Amber Alert notification...that's just bad timing.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
