before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I would like to apologize for my MANY attempts of trying to motor boat you.
The melted ice in my drinks tonight is probably the most water I've had in like 3 days accumulated.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Discovery: bouncers seem to get really upset about fire
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
He's got a big dick, a steady job and tells me I'm pretty. There is litterally nothing else I look for I a guy.
Randomize
