my vagina has a 5:00 shadow
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
I feel like I'm one of those people who someone looks at and thinks "how did she get into this college"
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
he confused my yawn for an orgasm
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
I'm gonna go out on a limb and say it had something to do with pool sex.
I gave up yolo and cigarettes for lent. I owe god a sincere apology.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
Most senic walk of shame ever. This is why you go to school in Hawaii.
Are you vicariously golddigging through me?!
You act like tequila is some sort of sex juice
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
